Jamaica, Part II.

Onward we must go!

Day 3
      Today, I worked at the Lord's Place with Caroline, Chrissy, Lizzie, and Adele.  I think this is the biggest home, since it has a side for elderly women and a side for HIV/AIDS patients. Once again, I was struck by how familiar all of the residents were.  They were ready to dance the minute we walked in, and Fr. Todd did a wonderful job of getting down with the ladies!  At one point, Caroline asked one of the girls why she looked so sad.  The girl told her that she was missing her mom and didn't know when she'd get to see her again.  As they talked, she told Caroline that she was 19 and had been at the Lord's Place for three years.  She hadn't seen her mother since she got there.  How heartbreaking is that? So many of us are quick to lash out at our moms or roll out eyes when we don't like what they have to say.  We don't think twice before saying something hurtful when caught in a disagreement.  Would your mom ever drop you off and leave you for, most probably, the rest of your life to live in a center full of mentally ill women? Yeah, I didn't think so.  I definitely took a few steps back and thought about everything my mom has ever done for me. Geez, I owe her so much! I could say thank you millions of times, and it still wouldn't feel sufficient.
      During lunch, we celebrated Brother Leo's birthday!  There was cake AND soda, which means this was a really, really big deal.  It was really cool to see what a birthday celebration is like for these guys.  They have a huge meal full of laughter just like we do, and they also give really nice speeches about the person celebrating their birthday.  Oh, and me and Caroline's favorite brother from last year recognized us! So exciting!!! In the afternoon, we fed the residents their yogurt (it will be a long time before I eat Yoplait again) and watched a movie with them.  When the work day was done, we were reunited with a very solemn group from Bethlehem, the children's home.  That morning, one of their residents had died, most likely from a seizure.  It just so happens, we found out later, that the girl's mother was coming to visit for the first time in six months that day. God works in such mysterious ways, doesn't he? While I found myself feeling somewhat sad for the girl and her family, I felt so happy for her because she is finally freed from her imperfect body and sitting right next to the man who loved her through it all!
      After we got home from working, I went with Chrissy and Maggie to watch some of the boys play futbol with the brothers.  We went to a local park, and since girls are not allowed to participate in games whatsoever with the brothers, we just sat and watched. We made a 12 year old friend who responded to every question with a "No, Miss," or "Yes, Miss," response. I truly hope he escapes the pull of the ghetto and is able to make something of himself! He gave us all gifts to bring back with us to America, and even though we couldn't bring the strange plants on the plane, I did manage to sneak home a few seeds. ;)

Soccer in the mountains.

      After returning from soccer, we went to evening prayer then had dinner together. I noticed then that we were slowly but surely becoming a family, even with Tim, Daniel, and Awet from Notre Dame. When working with MOP, you quickly realize there are very few people who will ever understand your experiences. Only the people in your group won't look at you like you're a crazy person once you get home! At dinner, we talking about the two martyrs.  In 2003, two brothers were shot and killed by a single bullet while doing the dishes.  Today, when the brothers tell the story, they smile the whole time. For us, it's hard to image being happy that someone is gone, but on their picture at every center the brothers have put their "Birthday in Heaven".  They realize how great a life those brothers are living now, and they were able to forgive the man who killed them.  They even helped out his wife financially when he himself was shot and killed! After hearing that, I realized that I need to work on forgiving people in my own life. It can be hard to forgive those who really hurt you, but holding grudges only holds you back.

Jamaica, Part I.

      Well, I'm back stateside! We got back late Friday night, and I think I've finally rested and recovered enough to share the amazingness of my trip with you. I'll break it up into a couple of days at a time, and most of what I write will probably be paraphrased from my journal. Get ready!

Day 1
      Going into this trip, I knew my heart wasn't in the right place.  I was spending most of my time running away from and dodging anything that might upset me, because frankly I was just plain exhausted and tired of feeling sad and disappointed.  I wanted to get on that first plane to Miami with total peace of mind, but I was nowhere near that when the day finally came.  When we got there though, it was as if I'd never left. Everything looked the exact same, and all of the memories came flooding back. They were all so good!
      Our first stop was Sacred Heart, the monastery that the brothers go to after completing the novitiate stage.  We had lunch there and got to see Father Ho Lung, the founder of Missionaries of the Poor! I really wish he'd been able to sit down and talk with us, but he was leaving the country soon for one of their concerts. He is seriously the most saintly person I have ever met and will probably ever meet, so it was really nice to see him again. After lunch, we headed to Jesus the Redeemer, the house for the "old brothers" and all the volunteers. We pretty much took over the third floor, and I'm positive we scared the three other volunteers we would come to consider members of our own family. We spent the rest of the day getting settled in - life in Kingston can take some getting used to!

One of the views from our patio, the always beautiful Blue Mountains!

Day 2

      On my first day of work, I went to Jacob's Well with Caroline, Adele, and Sarah P. Jacob's Well was the first place I went to last year, and the women there have had a special place in my heart ever since.  When we got there, we were greeted with happy screams and lots of hugs. It's crazy how easily I recognized the women and remembered their personalities. Names are a bit harder, but they tend to change their names every time the wind blows.  In the morning, I brushed teeth, washed faces, and applied lotion before washing mattresses and feeding them lunch.  When I was with those women, I found myself thinking of my own mother. What if she needed me in this way? Many of the women in this center are the age of mothers and grandmothers, and it can feel so weird to spoon feed them or brush their teeth for them.  As weird as it feels though, the apprehension fades so quickly. You can feel the love and thankfulness coming from them, and immediately you realize you're going to get so much more out of this trip then you ever thought you would.

      That night, I realized that some of the peace I'd been seeking had returned to me. It's nearly impossible to ignore God and what he's trying to tell you when you spend so much of your day in prayer and in the presence of His love.  In the end, my fate will be decided by how I showed love, not spoke of it.  

One of the gorgeous residents of Jacob's Well, taken last year.
She's still got that smile though!

Two Down, Two to Go (Well...4...Maybe 5...)

      I did it! I finished this awful semester without just giving up and running away, and I managed to pull out a pretty decent GPA too! I really can't even begin to tell you what it feels like to be done with two years of college.  I feel like just yesterday I was sitting in church waiting to hear my name called to receive my diploma. Was that really TWO YEARS ago?! It's insane how much things have changed since I left high school, especially in the last six months. Long story short, this year didn't go anything like I expected it would, but I'm so grateful for every single thing that happened. Yes, even the things that I was sure would lead to my demise. I made it through so much more than an impossible physics class, and I couldn't have done it without my amazing Baton Rouge family.  You know, that might be the best part of it all. I've got this established group of people that I know I can go to with anything, and they will all comfort me in their own unique way. Some will hug me, some will slap me, and some will laugh at me. And I love them all the same for it.
      Last weekend, Stewy's brother got married! It was a lot of fun, but it definitely confirmed for me that I do not want a big wedding. I just don't think I could handle the stress, or the attention, or the planning...bleh. So if you want to be at my wedding, camp out at the courthouse and you might get lucky! Here's one of my favorite pictures from the night (and there were a lot to choose from)!

Love those girls!

      This past weekend was Hayley's bachelorette party, and it was so much fun! We went to Painting with a Twist (where I learned I am not an artist), out to eat at Agave, and then out in downtown Lafayette (where I do not want to show my face for about six months...or years). It still amazes me all the time that she's doing as well as she is. She's raising a two year old, planning a wedding, and getting ready to go to dental hygiene school, and she somehow manages to keep her sanity. It really is amazing!  I still can't wrap my head around the fact that one of my good friends is getting married. I don't like growing up! Look how cute we are hehe :)

Momma and I.

      This afternoon, I'm heading back to Baton Rouge to get ready to leave for Kingston tomorrow. I really can't believe the trip is already here! I still haven't packed or prepared in any way really. I can't lie, I'm not as excited as I'd like to be, but I'm pretty sure that will change the minute we head to the airport. My mind has been so consumed with trivial things for the past few months and weeks that I've found it hard to focus on the things I should focus on. I think this trip will get me back where I need to be. Last year was truly life-chaning, and I haven't forgotten a single thing I learned while I was there. I can't wait to get tons of hugs from the residents and talk to all the brothers and sisters about their lives. I can't even put into words how it feels to be surrounded by so much love. There's just no experience that compares to this one. How often do you get to swallow your pride and feed a woman who is your mother's age? Talk about humbling. If you want to look into the face of Christ, all you have to do is keep your eyes open in Kingston. He's literally everywhere. Yes, He's everywhere in America too, but we tend to hide Him behind our iPhones and computers and Facebook and...you get what I'm saying. I was reading through my journal from last year last night, and at some point I wrote, "When you remove all of our "wealth", you can see how truly poor in spirit we are." That's still so true to me. When you remove all of your worldly possessions and successes and everything like that, you are left with only your weak spirit...and it can suck sometimes. In the next ten days, I look forward to getting back on track towards the life I'm supposed to be living. 

Last year's group with Fr. Ho Lung, the founder of MOP.

      If you're a prayerful person, please keep me and the other 24 missionaries in your thoughts and prayers while we're gone. We leave tomorrow morning at 2am, and we get back really late on the 25th. So if you're looking for me, don't look too hard. You'll never find me! This trip is going to be life changing, and I can't wait for everyone who hasn't been to experience it. Get ready for some crazy good posts when I get back and come out of my post-mission coma. Later!

Be Still and Know.

      Wow. Today I finished classes, which means I'm one week away from being halfway done with college (well, undergrad). I can't even begin to explain how insane that feels to me.  I swear just yesterday, I was posing in front of church in my cap and gown with all of my dearest friends. Can I just say how totally blessed I am to still have my dearest friends in my life today? I realize how lucky we are to all be at the same school doing some of the same things. I don't know if I could get through anything without them! And with that, I reminded myself that Stew is moving, so I'm stopping there before this turns into a boohoo post!
      Tuesday was pretty much the craziest day I've had in a while. I turned in two huge assignments, gave a presentation, took a final, and then headed to New Orleans with Stew to see The Fray. They were so amazing! There's just something about a man who can sing (and sing really well) that I love so much. It was at Tipitina's, so it was a venue the size of House of Blues or The Varsity. As much as I love big shows, I love small shows with big artists even more. Need I remind you all of the unplugged set at the end of the Needtobreathe show?! Marvelous. Anyway, I'm so glad we decided to live it up and head over there for the evening. I mean there's just nothing that can compare to seeing an artist who's good on the radio be even better live. I love it! Here's a song that I think you'll all know.

Oh, and here's Isaac Slade three inches from my face. No big deal though.

Okay, it's a really big deal.

      Tomorrow, Mel and I are heading west for a weekend full of physics! Woo! Oh, and I guess we'll make sometime to go see Stew's brother get married. Maybe we'll (okay...I'll) even have a margarita or two. I deserve it! I probably won't reappear here until next Friday or Saturday, so try not to miss me too much. Later!

P.S. 13 DAYS TIL JAMAICA!